<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d30347822\x26blogName\x3dteam+GIST\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLACK\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttp://masalados.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://masalados.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d-6914667120873946310', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

For the (824.23^12)th time

Wednesday, June 9

Okay. Some bad news first, and I’m not referring to Masalados’s revival. John Dykes is leaving ESPNSTAR and won’t be on our screens come the 2010-11 league season. I chanced upon this piece of news here, and I don’t know if he’s fronting ESS’s world cup coverage. I hope he is for I don’t want any brown clown (with the eminent exception of Harsha Bhogle) bungling it. Heaven forfend that any caramel-coloured fellow should be in our faces, fumbling his way around mispronouncing every other name and casually murdering the language the way only we can. I have seen Richard Keys host Sky’s Premier League coverage and he is but a pale shadow of JD’s. Now considering Sky is the Premier League’s host broadcaster, it is perhaps safe to assume that ESPN Asia had the services of the best football presenter anywhere in the English-speaking world. So it was only a matter of time before someone was going to poach Dykesy. This is a bigger tragedy than the verdict in the Bhop India’s recent humiliation at the hands of Zimbabwe.

This is an exhortation – no, a plea – to the other two contributors to not throttle this just-resuscitated blog and keep it medically alive, at least for the duration of the world cup. This is one tiny period when our usually barren minds will have ideas shoehorned in. Men, let this space be reserved for our rants, analyses, and anything else. Aaytha?

Labels: , , ,

Author: scv » Comments:

Friday, May 1

Okay. Here's another attempt at reviving this blog. Previous revivals have begin with a flourish only to end in tears and much misery. However,all this start-stop business will only make this blog last longer. Or so Dr.Watsa tells us. On the agenda is the not-so-simple matter of bringing back to life "Kamasutra: The series". Characters have grown more complex, becoming increasingly harder to profile. Offences have increased not only in number but also in severity and brazenness, posing a unique challenge to chronicler and casual observer alike.
Neanderthaldude, meanwhile,will talk of how a man's life can alter in 4 months if he takes his doctor's words seriously (the experiences recounted herein may not all be his own)."Slow and steady wins the race" will have never made more sense.
Squid-ho,for his part, will hold forth on a number of contemporary issues like:
a. Why roast cashewnuts and Russian drinks don't make good bedfellows.
b. Why lending gaming consoles and portable hardware devices to acquaintances might not be such a good idea after all.
c. Why Bacary Sagna will never need suntan lotion.

All this and more in this week's Masalados Mark II.

Author: scv » Comments:

Almost a year after Euro 2008...

Thursday, January 22

Just a list of messages that were exchanged during the European Championships in Austria, Switzerland (or was it Sweden? I'm confused).
>Hey. This cunt soole maga Sunil Taneja is at it again. Who needs this effing hindi commentary man, thooo.
>Woh. Listen to this, as the swiss came to take a free kickhe called Senderos a Khatharnaak Khiladi.
>Lol, he made such a big deal for those handshakes only. "aur ballebazo haath mila rahe hai best of luck kehne khe liye". Hahaha, Sunil "i'm a wanker" Taneja.
> Hindi for beating a defender is "defender kho chakma dethe hue". Chakma.Haha, sounds like "bad word".
>I will tell to teeeacher, nikhil said a baaad word, i will tell to teeeacher. ( no idea how this found mention)
>The Romanian leftback is a "Rat". Heh, a rat!
>Only three white French players on the pitch compared to Romania's eleven. (no guesses where this came from)
>Boring game. Makele has seen more of the ball than anyone else.
>Time for the (black?) panther Bafetimbe Gomis to brighten (heh) the game up.
>Yess! The black panther's coming on.
>Players like Makelele shouldn't be allowed man. Absolute waste of black paint.
>This indian guy's a prat (reference to Sunil Taneja) : "counter attack technology" it seems.
>Haha, Nuno gomes looked seriously pissed off while singing the national anthem, serious sex offender type aggression!
>Spain! Ehh, yeah, no upset.

Author: squid-ahoy! » Comments:

It was, but not a stormy night.

Wednesday, November 12

This can be considered an inspired work of fiction.

The day had started out well enough. Better than most days even. The GPs having let exclusive control over the house be my responsibility, and the maid banging in vain at the door, when I was catching the last two or so of my forty winks.

I made my own attempts at making the day better as well, 'I shall not go to college today!'. Barring the now normal three hours of lack of electrical supply, the day did go the way it promised to.
A match between Manchester United and Arsenal FC was deemed to be the highlight of the day, and inviting friends over to 'catch the match' only seemed polite. As was par for the course, so to speak, drinks were only to be expected. Here, thy author would like to confess that he did go back on a previous vow to self, of not planning to touch anything of a high percentage. Regrettable, possibly.

To continue with the tale, the first ill omens were at kickoff itself, the harbinger being the very appreciated entity that goes by the common name of BESCom. Not to be ones to be easily dampened by matters that were but trivial (after all, human civilization has managed for centuries, nay millenia without 230V 50Hz ac), we continued with the other main event for the day. Dental appendages being modified as bottle openers, our kick-off happened as scheduled. Buoyed by the fantastic initial momentum, the collective decision was that more drinks were in order. This was not the turning point for the day. With work being equally deputed, mine being procurement of manchurian, gobi and manchurian, mushroom and that of the #1 fellow being a quarter of bottled nail polish remover, things were smooth only. Adding to our high spirits, was the resumption of services by the already mentioned appreciated entity.

As the match drew to a close, without the result being quite which was eagerly anticipated, we decided to get carried away. Some steps away was an automated teller machine, and we made it successfully back, with but four steps missed. The order to one particular Baron was the same and homewards we turned.

This was the turning point. This was where the Gods above decided some adventure was in order for the day. This was the time when the fifteen year old deadbolt manufactered by Godrej (guaranteed for ten years) decided it had had enough. The key in my hand refused to turn. Half hour it took for this matter to sink into our half-elevated brains. By this time, however, three more friends we had invited over. Three more, in which to share our misery. The three seemed amused by this, and I would state that it wasn't quite a waste of time for them.

At this point, I'm bored of typing this out. We were locked out of the house for the night. Ashte happened. Full experience, plus demonstration of loyalty by that particular #1 fellow (may he live long.) at 5am the next morning.


Author: neanderthaldude » Comments:

Useless, we are? I think not.

.. and the power cuts and the mosquitoes have had their effect on my addled brain. Four hours a day is but a sixth, you can argue. I don't care.

In any case, massimiliano and thy not-so-humble-but-quite-lazy author have had interesting mobile communications. Cheap jokes and bad English aside, there's been a noticeably amateur attempt to codify some of the vices we are rather unfortunately prone to at times. A weakness that every human is afflicted by, we argue.

The end results (ranked in ascending order or percentages, heh.):

More intelligent friend
Orphan's parent's
King's Stiff Task
Boxing match finisher
Bird with strength
In the direction of dry grass
Environmental Sticker
Aged Hermit
Male deer, of royal blood.
Marine dental accessory
Combustible liquid

And the lack of sleep the previous night so caused the author to come up with some truly terrible ones. Nevertheless, they are showcased here, just for thee.
Punjab Twenty-20's favourite low-percentage drink
Purity in naughtiness (later corrected to not-dark for naughtiness)

Answers, you ask? It is for you to seek, my friend.

Slap me, and I shall cease this affected tone, and be my normal self.

Labels: ,

Author: neanderthaldude » Comments:

Part 2

Wednesday, October 15

Kama Sutra I T has a soul – one you’re sucked into sooner rather than later. People have mounted stoic defences, only for them to crumble and be swept away.The wise put up no resistance. Only the foolhardy suffer KS’s virulent reaction before it swallows them whole and lets out an almighty belch – a “he should’ve just gone with the flow” message to the rest of them.
“This place effs your mind” ruminates a classmate(More like rapes. Either that or it should be ‘effs up’.Simply ‘effs’ leaves open the possibility of consent). It’s true though. There’re people who’ve walked into KS’s arms on day one merrily, only to find their minds in a state of disrepair weeks later – a mind mangled beyond recognition. Some reach for the bottle in the futile hope of salvaging something. The rest know.

Author: scv » Comments:

Kama Sutra - The series(hopefully)

Wednesday, October 8

I stand there dazed, at the gate, as hundreds of them flit by –the sins of last night forgotten, and plans drawn afresh for today. It’s a cold day.I retreat into the depths of my jacket, looking for warmth. Others are looking for warmth too- warmth generated by acts performed in liaison with someone of the other gender. The sight of a semi-molestation greets me as I make my way up the staircase. A classmate is feeling up a hapless girl from the first year, taking advantage of the rush on the staircase. He gives me a wink that I don’t care to return. The girl is oblivious to the goings on, her ignorance surpassed only by her stupidity.
It’s no different inside the classroom. Several pairs of leering eyes transfixed on one low neckline. Curses are hurled as I momentarily block their lines of sight. I find myself a seat in the corner in the second-from-last bench - that delightful place, gateway to anywhere, where the mind can roam without fear of being noticed(and hence shackled). There’s a nudge. My neighbour points to the visual-rape victim. “Full exposing musumbiyaan today. Sexy, no?” are his opening lines. I nod and turn to the paperback I’ve just fished out of my bag. He continues- ” why are you shy? It’s free da. Everyone is enjoying, see?” I don’t have to look around for a confirmation of that statement.

End of part one
ps: I know it's short.Please don't molest me.


Author: scv » Comments:

Kid's Rock

Friday, May 23

advertisement. unpaid for.
Tim Hawkins, it seems.


Author: neanderthaldude » Comments: